First Snow

I'm pretty amazed that we made it all the way to December 7 before it finally snowed (it flurried a little last week but it didn't even make it to the ground). I woke up this morning to snow on the trees and grass, and slush on the sidewalks. It made my walk to the train interesting and slippery. I really don't miss winter at all.

Favorite Snack

Yum pirate booty :D

(Can you tell I really like my new camera???)

Yarn

My friend was making something out of yarn and had a lot of little bits left over on the table.

Problem/Challenge out of String

When I feel like things are particularly out of control and I am really agitated, what is most calming for me is to work with string. I had forgotten about this but I really think working with string is what got me through 7th grade (probably the hardest year of my life so far, with a bully who posed as my "best friend" and was both emotionally and occasionally physically abusive). In 7th grade, once I started making bracelets every night, spending hours tying knots, I soon was able to separate myself from this bully and asked to transfer schools for the next year.

I used colorful embroidery floss and started a little business that was perhaps surprisingly organized: 25c for a standard 3 string bracelet, 10c for every string after that - for custom orders it was 50c + the regular charges. I was a little entrepreneur. I made a lot of money in quarters that year, which partially went to buying more string (and eventually expanding to making beaded rings or including beads in the bracelets, also at extra cost). I'm still pretty proud of how organized it was. I used to display my inventory on my backpack (I hung the bracelets off of the back using safety pins) so people could see my wares as I walked the hallways. I did accept trades, as many girls were making elastic bracelets with big plastic beads - only a few years ago did I realize the colors of the beads on those bracelets apparently stood for various sexual acts the person wearing them was willing to perform. I just liked the colors.

My former bully was my biggest competitor in the market, but she priced her bracelets too high and her workmanship was shoddy. Everyone went to me, especially since I did custom orders, but especially because I wasn't an ass. So through the bracelet making I learned that nobody really liked this person who had isolated me and made me feel terrible about myself. I also had conversations with people who formerly hadn't spoken to me. I also spent a lot of time in a semi-meditative state, tying knots for hours at night, not thinking but allowing myself to relax. It didn't reverse the damage she had done to me, but it made me feel better in some way - is that wrong?

Anyway, I've tried crocheting at various points in my life and it is coming up again in grad school as an alternative medium for art therapy. However, I am sadly inept at crocheting. This is probably due to my inability to follow directions and keep track of what I'm doing.

Tonight I was feeling really agitated and angry (as you can read in my previous post about the craft fair). It wasn't only the craft fair that was making me angry, but I won't go into the rest here. I have a project due on Thursday where we are supposed to make an art piece about a problem or challenge at our internship. So instead of doing my standard watercolor painting, I dragged out the yarn and decided to crochet with no purpose and no design, letting whatever formed form, and not be disappointed in the results.

This is what happened:


I started with the circle, which was originally intended to be flat, but like I said I can't follow directions and now it is a mountain. The hand really grew organically, first I had a weird outgrowth of the circle, then a finger, then two fingers, then I realized it was a hand and finished the hand. I went back and reinforced the rest of the piece, including adding a handle, when I realized it looked a lot like a chamsa. I added the blue to the evil eye part to give it an extra protective element.


I think at first it was supposed to be about figuring out how to make all of the different elements work together. I started off with white, brown, and orange yarns, trying to use three pieces of yarn at a time. Then the orange ran out, so I added another yarn, which is kind of gray with multi-colored flecks in it. When I realized what was happening I was able to create a recognizable shape, but not just any shape, a protective shape.

I think one of the biggest challenges of my internship is figuring out how to be myself there. I feel so protective over people that I work with, but I think I don't take good enough care of myself. I have to see the bigger picture, and think of everyone involved and not just the particular client I am closest to at the moment.

I think the chamsa appeared as a wish to be more protected, because maybe I still feel very insecure there, even when I feel like I do a good job I don't feel secure.

Disappointed @ Renegade Craft

Last September I went to the Renegade Craft Fair and had a few really good finds. Most of all, I had a good time walking around, hanging out with my friend who was in for the weekend, seeing the vendors (a few I knew personally yayyy), and getting ideas for my own crafting.

I applied to the Holiday fair that was this weekend and didn't get in. I want to state for the record that I'm not at all bitter about it, that I'm pretty sure our application wasn't professional enough anyway, and had been looking forward to the fair since I got home from the one in September. I advertised it to all my friends, even saw a few there, and made sure I had enough cash (but not TOO much cash) to spend.

Boy was I disappointed.

First of all, I understand space constraints when you have a craft fair inside because it is freezing cold out. I get that. And there probably was some cost issues with finding a decent site. Okay. But it was so crowded I had to spend a lot of energy just moving around. That means I spent more time figuring out how to get from booth to booth than I spent at each booth.

Second of all, everything was priced too high. This was probably because it was a "holiday" sale and people thought they could get away with it. Well, that really sucks. Earrings I thought were worth $20-30 were priced at $40+. Even things that I was vaguely interested in were way above what I was willing to spend.

Also, a note to vendors: If you are "recycling" objects you found at the junk store, do not charge $100+ if you don't somehow elevate the junk store find from its junk store status. Don't find an "awesome" gear and then stick a necklace chain on it and charge $120. That is freaking lame. I didn't even take a closer look a booths where I saw that happen.

Ugh, I am so disappointed and sad. I went with money in my pocket to buy some interesting hand made things and ended up leaving tired and frustrated.

JewishGuy also pointed out that the entire fair was targeted at young women... like, middle-class women in their 20s (like me). There was almost no variety. I agree, but as the target audience I didn't mind as much, I just wished I could have afforded anything there. We went to the Renegade Craft Fair instead of the One of a Kind show (both going on at the same time) because I was sure the One of a Kind show was priced too high and I would leave feeling the way I do now.

In the end, if you didn't go this winter, you probably didn't miss anything.

Wow I am really in a bad mood now. What can I do to feel better?

Purple

Enjoying the sunlight.

Fiona

It is very hard to get a good picture of a guinea pig, especially one who wants food RIGHT NOW.

Purple Flower

My pink spotted plant is growing weird, Burton-esque purple flowers.

Gift for Grandma

My grandma used to go to the weekly art group at her assisted living facility but recently stopped (which she didn't tell me). So when I found out I asked her why, she said because she was having a hard time with her grip and vision, and felt like people were looking over her shoulder (felt self-conscious about the quality of her work). I was pretty sad to hear that she doesn't go anymore because she seemed to really like it.

Her birthday just passed so I've put together a care package full of grandma-friendly art supplies.


At the top is a package of white Model Magic, which is this awesome clay that crayola makes. It is really clean and easy to use and air dries. Then you can paint or draw on it. I also got her a pad of drawing paper and an orange pencil bag (her favorite color, at least that's what I hear). The weird silver thing at the top is a pencil sharpener that fits both the thin colored pencils and the thick regular pencil. There's also a big eraser. I guess you can't see those last two things in this picture... Oh well.



I outfitted the pencils and paint brushes with foam for a better grip. I cut apart cosmetic triangle applicator things, cut a hole in the middle, and slid the pencils through. It was really easy to do and I think it will be effective (we'll see, though). The pencils are also triangle shaped, which is supposed to help with grip, with bumps on it, also for grip.

The foam also helps with picking up the pencils because they are lifted above table-level, as well as preventing them from rolling away.


The cool thing is that these are watercolor pencils, which means grandma can draw or color with them and then use a wet paintbrush to turn the drawing into a painting. This makes it a clean and easy way to paint. I think she can even use these on the model magic.

Also, just for the record... the pencils are made from reforested wood and the paper is made from paper recycled using wind power! Grandma has such a low carbon footprint. I guess... some people just care more than others about the environment... *smug smug smug* (Southpark reference) Maybe that makes up for the not-so-environmentally friendly brushes and clay and packaging.

:-P

I was careful not to buy the crayola products except for the Model Magic. A lot of times people feel like they are being treated like a child if they are given crayola products unless they are secure in their art making abilities. It's sad because crayola does make some awesome products but it is important, I think.

I am excited to figure out a way to modify art supplies for grandma. I hope they work out!

NEW CAMERA!!!!

My new glorious Cannon SD940IS. It is a beautiful little camera, so small and sleek, with so many features including an awesome wide-screen photo option. I have been taking weird pictures just to test it out.

Also I got my camera in time to do a project for my family therapy class where I am making a "creative" family album. I took pictures of what everyone ate for Thanksgiving dinner :)

More photos later... Hearts to my new camera <3 <3 <3